My Dearest Christopher,
I miss you my baby, my little boy, my young man, my son
I miss the days filled with laughter, mischief and fun.
I miss your smile, your jokes, and your warm embrace
I miss the many expressions that were unique to your face.
I miss your voice, the conversations, and the songs
The sound of your feet when you’d stay up all night long.
I miss your laughter, your kindness and your caring ways
Your genuine warmth and your ability to brighten my every day.
I miss your wit, your charm, your grace
Those qualities that made this world a much better place.
I miss the beep of the microwave when your pop tart was done
The Thursday nights, playing darts, eating pizza, having fun.
I miss your sensitivity, your goofiness, and your charm
I miss your loud music and the sound of your alarm.
I miss Halloween, summers and swimming in the pool
The stories you’d tell me each day when you came home from school.
I miss the way you tie your shoes and the way you comb your hair
And the cider donuts that you’d bring home from the county fair.
I miss the noise that you made when you ate dinner at night
I miss kissing your cheek, and pulling your covers up tight.
I miss the towels on your floor and your very messy room
The way you tripped upstairs and that loud sounding boom.
I miss your touch, your rhymes and how you talk
You leaving for school and watching you walk.
I miss your struggles with math, history essays and report cards
Shooting hoops from the deck and playing badminton in the yard.
I miss your optimism, your strengths, and your fears
You were so much wiser than your short 16 years.
I miss your great intolerance to bugs and to pain
And when something was wrong, there’s always Josie to blame.
I miss the way you smell and the way you wore your pants
The daily comments to Bob filled with sarcasm and sass.
I miss watching movies and you reciting all the lines
Pulling in the driveway and seeing your bedroom light brightly shine.
I miss the special days – Christmas, your birthday, the prom
I can’t ever explain how much I miss you calling me “Mom”.
I miss the Red Sox hats and your beautiful blue eyes
I miss that I never had the chance to say goodbye.
But what I miss the most is what your life should be
The promise of your future, becoming a teacher and having a family.
I have such wonderful memories, but they’re all from the past
Memories of the present and future, we’ll never have that chance.
Knowing you can’t have yesterday, today or tomorrow
Fills my broken heart with indescribable sorrow.
If I only had one wish, it would be to change the past
And you would be here now, growing up so very fast.
If that one wish had come true, it simply should be
You’d still be here today and one day you should be missing me.
You are the greatest gift that I ever will receive
You made my life complete, but now I’m left to grieve.
I miss everything about you from your head to your toe
What it’s like to lose you, nobody will ever know.
I made you a promise at birth, right from the start
I will always love you and you will live forever, my son,
deep within my heart.

“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away.” Thank you, my sweet boy, for all the moments that you took my breath away.

Love, Mom